The 5 Word Story Game - PART FOUR (3695 views, 656 replies)

The objective is to add 5 words to the existing story.

You can change the story as much as you like in those 5 words.


(Carried forward from the last entry on PART THREE...)


Crutchbender

whereupon an alien spaceship lands

on your anus and secret

instructions tell the aliens what

which happens to fuel their

but the exhaust fumes reek

made from the skin of

so their skin was hardy

which gets filmed by Attenborough [SPOILER]for new BBC wildlife Lifecrutch in the wild

who can't seem to explain

why so many end up [SPOILER]dead in Texas

with warts on their genitals

as they wash with Dove

and acid wash, which should

the blob in his trousers

is covered in mossies so

it was a challenge to

reach the alien hospital in

the underground parking garage on

the turbo quasi nuclear scooter

which backfires incessantly and smokes

reefers to beat Bob Marley

with his own dreads, simply

to hear "no Woman, no Cry"

coming from below the floor

ready to feast on gonads

of people identifying as goats

, pigs, sheep because four legs

make for tastier nuts for

guests have eaten all the

the smelly, smooshy zombie crustacean

Who seems more green than

an astronaut on re-entry when

suddenly he starts eating the

granny's yellowed toenail clippings and

and her ear wax coated

used q-tip heads are succulent

when dipped in chocolate fondue

That has been left on

the bloodstained tea towels everyone

uses to wipe after flossing

their vaginal teeth and prickly

armpit hairs which tickled and

which would ruin the yummy

until Marv the Marvellous cook

Scratched his butt with the

spatula, scraping pimples and scabs

into the main course of beans

beans the magical fruit the

starts a poker game, invites

who brought questionable but rich

, for Texas holdem, are drawn

and everyone placed their antes

[SPOILER]and uncles in the middle and waited

when suddenly big Sam accuses

Col. Edge Dean of touching

him inappropriately under the table

grazing his nuts with sharp

Pikes of a taxidermist hedgehog

burrowing deep into the fleshy

sack, only to discover, not the expected balls

but donut holes, a snack

bar and PV with waterbottles

spiked with roofies for Sue

who offered another finger to

Stirr some viscous green stew

that would feed the gamblers

With the cards dealt, each

made of seared human flesh

so the faceup cards were

ironed flat bits of foreskin

making their value hard to

decipher as the Queen of Hearts had

connective tissue across her face

while another Jack was trying

to flip over on her

and expose himself to the

surprise of croupier John, who

slapped him down, leading the Dean boys

to stand up in revolt

,draw their pistols, and shoot

tequila while their guns dangle

lifeless next to their flaccid

Vanilla ice retro pants while

(Some people call em Alladin pants instead of Harem trousers)

croupier John slowly extracted the

key from his right nostril

that locks the safe where

are, just in case he

he forgets them and needs

to mark them with urine

from each of his fifty-two

coarse pubic hairs in the

bottom right hand corner so

card case, one for each

for good luck but soon

the players began to notice something iffy (and sniffy)

and they recoiled from the

table but the pot was full

was poised with two aces

and the second betting round

and John flips a 3

7s, and she calls Sam's $1000

of the obvious bulge in

were crossed as they scavenged

the cooler for snacks while

small, but deadly, insects swarmed

over the table, obscuring the

blood soaked body lying prone

on top of the cards

and Sue's vacant stare pondered

With those thoughts, the game changed

and was suddenly more sinister

if you like toilet talk

which of course they did

so a break was called

for a group bathroom meeting

examining pee and poo whilst

with binoculars and wearing rubber

ducky costumes, anticipating bathing together

at the Sentō eating sushi

and tickling eachother with chopsticks

on their balls or with

free onaholes being passed around,

so the bathhouse employees captured

which left them all shaped like broomsticks

"morning sweep" they called it

until John blew them all

"colored" and obviously blood-stained

but this was a delusion

although it did restore them

and brought them to their senses

how the glory hole hallucination never

smelled right; pee ewww the

Quasigoat pissed herself while stripping

and the combination of odors

nauseated the gambling crew, meaning

the stampede to the toilets

but this time with silverware

became Slaughter-Out-House Five

When the poo started flying

it was the least of their

problems because there was also

the Quasigoat with her keen sense

of wriggling maggots to feed on

death of the gamblers because

First clue was chopsticks sticking

Out of her anus hence

Quasigoat being so angry all

left in her birthing sac

and poor Sam's murder unsolved

being 0-for-5 solving cases

so he phones his best friend [SPOILER]in the PI business

Dick who could detect a

crime at least three times a week

before his "monthlies" came on

when solving went down the toilet

unless Quasigoat ate the clots first

which meant Dick's powers of

detection ceased until she pooped

out a Quasigoat wanna be

so while she is grunting

and doing things Quasigoats do [SPOILER]in these troubled times

out plops another helper to

and watch Liverpool win 1-0

which gave Dick back his mojo

so Dick, with mojo in one hand

Quasigoat's offspring in the other

needs ready to crack this case!

Dick phones his contact in FBI

a Quasigoat, and double agent

to mate and produce hybrids

Meanwhile another contact gives Dick

the location of a body spotted

with leprotic ulcers and genital